Monday, January 26, 2009

So I have yet another dilemma on my hands... I'll just be honest and say it, it is along the lines of WWJD, but with a twist. You see, I have had some ideas rolling around in my head for a while, and as seems prone to happen, this one was clarified by a book that I just finished by Henri Nouwen. And as also happens, the book really didn't address the thoughts in my head, but a phrase catalyzed what thoughts I did have into cohesion. And so I will start with that thought. Henri's book "In the Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership" is the book in question for those taking notes. In the book, one of the things that Henri finds himself discussing is the idea that ministry, and indeed life, is not meant to be undertaken alone. Let's not forget that Henri has written at length about the virtues and necessity of solitude and the importance of such in one's individual relationship with God, but that is certainly not the only aspect of our walk/time here in these oh so mortal shells. Again, written for clarity. At any rate, as I said, he was mentioning an experience that he had on a ministry trip that he took, and how it became so very apparent to him the necessity of "others", particularly of at least one other. Now of course, I have already addressed this issue myself on more then one occasion in various blogs, but a new level of  understanding/insight into my own life came with this most recent occurrence. It is here that my mind wandered from Henri's book deep into my own thoughts...

So as I was thinking about ministry, and as I also said, life itself, in pairs, this line of thought clashed with events and this clash birthed new thoughts. (Thoughts which I delicately label as such as they have not yet earned the labels of "revelation" or "deeper understanding"...) I have a friend whose opinion I greatly value and respect and while I am growing in my understanding of myself, I am still only partially aware of why this person (or any person for that matter...) has such a position in my psyche, and indeed, this experience actually prompted further insight into this, but that is off immediate topic, and may be surmised from my writing anyway, that remains to be seen... This friend is not immediately present currently, which makes communication a fair hurdle. But here is what I found...

Well first of all, I really shouldn't be trusted to make very many decisions on my own. There are going to be some decisions that I must by necessity stand alone on, and ones that I alone will answer for at the final judgement, but there are many, MANY that I would be remiss in not seeking some sort of council or partnering. At any rate, there was a decision that I have had to enter into and, as per usual, I at first let my emotions and gut make the decision, and this is where the other person comes in. I would have made a reactionary decision, and while it may end up being the same decision, had I gone with my "gut" I would have at best made the decision in the wrong way, and for the wrong reasons. Through my life I have run across some people that have impacted me, and for better or for worse (mostly better) they have become a voice in my life, either in actual audible voice, or even passing rarely into that "voice in my head" realm. Now granted, I am an odd guy. I will basically "talk" to myself and talk through decisions/ideas in my head, so as odd as it may seem, it only makes sense for me to talk to someone else, even if they are not actually present. This is where I found myself of late. I caught myself thinking, "What would so-and-so say/think?" The thoughts slowed me down and really helped my thought process, and for that I am grateful.

I do feel like I should clarify something here. In the Christian walk, there are many decisions to be made and one look at the make up of Christianity in out nation, and even our world, quickly shows that every decision in not clear, even those that fall obviously under the bracelet of "What Would Jesus Do?" There are still many times when the input of another Christian is helpful, and that is what I refer to here. Even the disciples, those that walked with Jesus for most of His time of ministry here on Earth, were commissioned and sent out in pairs. I am not downplaying God's role in my decision making process, and indeed, He is ALWAYS the first person that I speak to, but I do not think that the wisdom/patience/etc. of another Christian can be thrown out. I think it can, and is, an important part of our lives and I have been blessed with a few good friends that have walked with me and helped me decide the right path. For this I am thankful.